Ambition & Appreciation: Striking a Balance

Firstly, I decided to do a post on this instead of arrogant people as I stated on my previous post. This is in light of the holiday season coming up.

"We wanted a better life, but in the end we were a lot worse off than most other people. You know, I think it is important to keep a balance in things. Yeah, balance. That's the right word. Because the guy who wants too much risks losing absolutely everything. Of course, the guy who wants too little from life might not get anything at all."

The Christmas season is coming up soon. It is a time where we spend time with our families, reminiscing over the things we have, whether there is a lot or not. Nonetheless, we are still breathing and living life. We may not have everything we want, such as a massage chair, a next generation gaming console, but that doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things, right?

WRONG! Have you seen people shopping for things? Parents will need to be making their list and checking it twice because if they get something wrong, their kids are going to be pissed.

This post is not relevant just to children, but to everyone. On the internet, it's called "First World Problems". No matter how much we obtain from life, we just want more and more. Look at Donald Trump, he has all the money that middle income earners could dream about. Yet, he still tries to get more, even at the cost of his family's well-being. No matter how well off we may be, there is always something better we can do. As a result, we lose focus on the past that one had to go through to achieve the here and now. Instead, we put our dukes up some more mindlessly, wanting to obtain more.

It is important to always be improving yourself. The consequence of not doing so could vary. At work for example, someone else may be in a similar position to you. They have the capacity to overtake you and ultimately drive you out completely. There may be other challenges that you face in your life that you are not prepared for, simply because you did not train yourself to be better prepared for the time when the situation suddenly arises. It is important to appreciate what you have, but if you don't improve yourself, you most likely won't go anywhere in life. As a result, you'll get very little. However, too much ambition will result in you never being happy. You'll never be satisfied with the work and progress that you've made, leaving yourself feeling empty. You may say that you want things to be perfect and go to plan. Here's the reality: Rarely are things perfect and rarely are do things go to plan. As a result, consistent ambition will leave you unhappy.

As the quote suggests, balance between ambition and appreciation is important. You can risk losing everything if you try to push the limits of what you can obtain and what you can't obtain, especially all at once. This is even more so with people since noone is perfect. Wanting too much from people can put you in a risk to lose them entirely.

Nobody and no thing is perfect in this world. You got to appreciate what you have, but strive to make improvements when you should.

JD

Are YOU a Rock? If so, For Who?

A rock may have varying definitions to different people. For this post, let's stick to two definitions.

A person is a rock if they are focused on objectives in their lives. Not someone who is necessarily there yet, but one who is able to put themselves in that direction and keep to it. There will always be steps backwards due to complications, but
as long as they keep going, that is what matters. These are objectives that are present in your heart and not artificial. Of course, each person's goal is different. It could be money, life, career, etc. The point is, a person is a rock if they can keep going whilst retaining their values along the way. A rock is also willing and accepting to learn, but able to filter out the bad things in their lives. Note that a rock for yourself isn't going to be someone that has fulfilled their objectives. It is someone that has set their objectives strongly and have built up momentum so that they place themselves in a position to reach it in the future.

Now how about being a rock for another person? You have to be someone that will be there for that person. Someone who will be put on their emergency contact list. Someone who will be there for the good times and bad times. Most importantly of all is someone who can steer you in the right directions to achieve your own goals and objectives in life. They will need to give you compliments and criticisms when the time is right. The ultimate rock is someone that can provide security for that person. This type of security differs for each person, so you can't simply be a rock for everyone.

The point of this post is this: Being a rock for yourself or someone else is not that simple. Firstly, you CAN'T  be a rock for someone else if you're not your own rock. Why? Think about it this way. You are friends with someone in your class and you have a test tomorrow. He/she knows the topic well and is in a position to help other people. In other words, be a rock for other people. He/she can be a rock for you. However, you have not revised at all. Therefore you are in no position to support anyone else.

Let's say if you tried to help this friend of yours. They are more experienced and familiar with the topic. You only appear experienced and familiar with the topic as opposed to being able to do it. If your friend were to accept your help, it could only mean disaster. Your friend would listen to your advice, but it would differ from what your friend has learnt. As a result, your friend could refuse any further assistance and not seek your help again for the longest time. Even worse, they could still accept your help, get more confused and thus take two steps back in revising for that test. In short, when things get complicated for no reason, things go wrong. Adding yourself unnecessarily into someone else's world may be just an additional pain for them. The last thing you want to be to those you care about is a liability.

So when you decide to commit into a relationship or a really committed friendship, instead of thinking what can this person do for me, think about what you can do for them. Of course it is important that they can do something for them so you can be each other's rocks. It is unfair if someone is simply freeloading off another (I'll talk about this in my next post). The truth is that most people tend to have one or the other, even those that are married. Some aren't a rock for themselves, but jump the gun; or they are a rock for themselves, but place themselves so far forward that they are in no position to help others.

In short, you have to change your own world first, then only can you place yourself in a position to change other people's world. This takes personal development first and may even require finding yourself and what you want in life. This will take time, but if you can do this first it will pay off, trust me.

JD

22 Years Old - 22 Things I've Learnt This Year

22 years old may seem like a pointless age around its earlier counterparts. 18 years old is a milestone age, 20 years old is a turn of a decade and 21 years old represents adulthood. In a way, age is just a number. You don't have to be too old or young to learn about some of life's turns and twists, or about the way people work. Here are 22 things I've learnt from this year, which I'm sure you as the reader can take into account. I could make an individual post on each point, but I'm gonna cut straight to the chase this time.

1. People suck. 9 out of 10 of them will piss you off most of the time. 1 out of 10 will be worth keeping.

2. There are two types of people you need to worry about: Those that are there temporarily and those that will stay in your life permanently. The ones that will stay temporarily are there to teach you something important. Once their use is exhausted, they will become a consistent liability for all the wrong reasons. They can be thrown out, despite how hard it may seem at first. This is not easy to determine at first sight.

3. Nothing will hit you harder than life itself. It isn't about how hard you get hit. It's about how hard you get hit, then how you get back up.

4. Business people are harder to keep close compared to others. If they do something for you, they will expect something from you back conditionally. If you need something from him, they won't move an inch to help out unless you've done them favours.

5. Balance is important to maintain in your life. Through work and play time. This imbalance will make things go wrong.

6. Karma does not always apply. Despite your hard work and best efforts, you could still lose out. Think about revising hard for an exam. You know all the topics back to front, but one. That one topic could be your undoing.

7. You cannot tell at first what role people play in your life. Judging solely based on a person's past towards you is just a dumb approach that leads to bias and misjudgment. A proportion of a person's past should be consider only if they have shown little to no signs of improvement.

8. People and things change over time, but some things will stay the same. You have to decide whether to keep all of them/it, or to lose all of them/it. It is essentially a gamble, because you do not know what role they can play in your life later. This decision can bite you back later if made wrong.

9. Every person has a story. You have good and bad guys in it. It wouldn't be an interesting story if you didn't have good and bad times alongside heroes and villains.

10. Love at first sight is bullcrap. I knew that already, but feeling from the start is bullcrap. Why? Because you know that person the least at this time. Your head is near useless to use and your gut feeling is not always right. This brings me to number 11.

11. Separately, your heart is an irrational moron and your head is a pessimistic dickhead. However, they can work together like a charm when used correctly. Your heart will be controlled from jumping the gun too quickly in your decision making and your head is able to work towards positive goals whilst considering the situation at hand. This brings me to number 12.

12. Your heart is a poor decision maker as it will normally considering only the past. present or future. Your head can be used to consider the past, present and future, not just one of the three. Balance comes into play here.

13. You need to your own rock before you can be someone else's. Why? Because if you are a foundation for someone else and you crumble, they will in turn fall.

14. The key to happiness is in your heart. That cannot be altered by your head or heart in any way.

15. To find your key to happiness, you need to know how to live without it.

16. Don't try to plan everything out, or try to control everything. The world doesn't resolve around you and there are things which you simply have no control over. This is something to just accept.

17. Life is a game of chess. One wrong move that you made 10 turns ago can cost you everything. You can't foresee it. It happens. Once again, just get back up.

18. Grades don't determine a person's worth.

19. To reach a goal, you need to know what your worth is first so you can know that you can achieve something. However, other people will pre-determine how much you are worth. Quality over quantity. The people who know you well should be the ones you listen to when determining how much you're worth. Many people will say otherwise, but they don't know you well enough to make that judgment.

20. Everyone's a lier. If a person interacts with you on a frequent basis, they WILL lie to you at some point of another. It may not be for ill intent, but it can be unexpected.

21. The person who asks for too much in life risks losing almost everything. The person will asks for too little in life of course won't get anything at all. Don't gamble too much.

22. Play your advantages as much as you can and make them well known when the time is right. Of course, don't be a loud mouth about it, or you could be making yourself a target in the future for future rivals or enemies.

JD

After Yesterday's Post - My Personal Experience This Year

When so many people put you down, it is hard to keep faith in yourself and to know what your true worth is. I just got to remember that it's not just about getting hit, it's about how hard I get hit and get back up again.

2013 has been full of it. Nothing beats you down harder and more repeatedly than life. That's why it is important to just get up after every hit you take, even if it comes unexpectedly. In fact, it comes unexpectedly most of the time, so you can't even prepare. I've learnt that people in life just suck. 9 out of 10 people that you're going to meet are going to screw things over for you. It is the 1 out of 10 that needs to be realised and kept in your life, because they are the ones that know your worth and your full potential. Not because they have to say it, but because they know what you're made of.

I've fucked up, made bad decisions, even got into bad situations out of my control without anyway to foresee. As a result, I was much worse off than what I could have been. The bad times are there so you can get through other bad times stronger than you previously did. It has no doubt been a shit house year for me, but the experience may be worth it in the future. Who knows, 2014 may be worse for all I know, but it could also be better. God works in strange ways, but I just have to keep getting up.

JD

The Truth About Your Past and Relationships in the Future - You're Not Perfect

Relationships are tough nowadays. When the going gets tough, many people tend to back off and call it quits. We are in a generation where people tend to dispose of things rather than fix them. Take Apple products for example. They can't be upgraded or modified like a normal PC can. So if an Apple product dies, it just gets thrown out and replaced, simple as that. I'm not saying that everyone does this. There are legitimate reasons for people dropping out of relationships. Impossible situations do occur when two people simply can't keep things up. It's like your entire PC is completely rusted somehow. PCs can be fixed, but in that kind of situation it can't be fixed no matter how much you modify it (let alone it'll be dangerous to experiment with it).

So what about the people that try to find their prince charming or Emma Watson? It may be up for debate, but both male and females are equally victims of "chasing the purple dragon" (Some may argue that a larger proportion of females than males are a culprit of this). What does that mean? It is an analogy for someone that is high on drugs and they see a purple dragon in front of them that they try to catch. Of course, the purple dragon isn't actually there. As a result, the drug induced victim is effectively chasing something that doesn't exist.

So yeah. A lot of people seem to be chasing something that does not exist. Some may argue that "Oh it does exist! You see in magazines and gossip that they're getting together and having kids and everything!" I say, "Sure, that's what you see on the surface. Do you really know what's going on behind the scenes? Why do you think Taylor Swift has so many songs about ex boyfriends? Why are there so many stories about divorce between celebrities and what not?" Put it simply: There is NO perfect relationship that exists on the planet. Probably in the universe.

The whole method of "chasing the purple dragon" is completely flawed for one reason: For a person to adopt good qualities, they have to had firstly made some mistakes. Thus that person can't really be perfect, since they've fouled up before. Where's your Prince Charming now?

So everyone has a varied past in someway or the other. Of course it is best to base a person on what they are now and what they can do in the future. But the truth of the matter is that barely anyone does this properly. People will ALWAYS judge you based on your past. It happens in relationship, friendships, job interviews, everywhere. It is a hard truth to shallow, but it is what it is in this case. So what if some important person in your life shallows your past and is able to live with it? Someone else connected with them will judge you based on your past AGAIN! It never ends!

There are three ways to use your past personally:

1. The good times - These are good moments that you had in the past. Thinking about these will make you happy. These can be looked back at for this purpose.
2. The bad times - These are bad moments that you had in the past. Thinking about these will make you sad. Just forget them because they serve no purpose, unless they are...
3. Life lessons - This is the most important use of the past. Life is like a teacher. Bad things happens and you ought to learn from them so you don't repeat the same mistakes again, or at the very least improve yourself next time. It's like a teacher marking your test. When you get your paper back, you know what you got wrong. You'll know what to do for the second test... Hopefully.

A fourth category is like the third one, which is simply to reaffirm what you learnt the first time. We are human after all, so we can forgot our previous lessons over time.

So why did I tell you this? Because that is for you to use on yourself to create a better future. However, we don't control everything so that formula may or may not work. Why? Because people are NOT going to judge your past and "sort" out your past events based on the above. They will use it only in two ways: In support for you, or against you. The formula is simple:

1. The good times - Used in your favour
2. The bad times - Used against you

For every criticism you give, t takes a hundred well dones to over ride that one remark. Have a ton of achievements, people will not think much of it. Make one mistake, and everyone goes insane over it. Unfortunately that is the way people work when it comes to judging people. It is even worse when people let the first impression of you be the last impression of you. Once again, a lot of people do this.

However, I'm not here just to be the bearer of bad news. There is something YOU can do.

First, know what's your worth and potential. Everyone has some talent in a way or another. Noone is completely useless. People may say otherwise, but when you seek out what you are worth, then you can work on proving that the bad times that you've had in the past shouldn't be used against you, and should just be forgotten.

Einstein failed classes in school, but did people use that against him when he became the most innovative physicist in the 20th Century? People kept their mouths shut. How about Kerry Packer? He was considered the class idiot in school, but he was the richest man in Australia. Once again, I wouldn't use his poor grades against him.

You ought to let your advantages be overwhelming. You got to prove to others that your past should not be used against you. Because most people can't see your potential. You got to look at yourself to see your own worth and know what you can do. Ultimately, you are in control of what you can do. Not necessarily in control of what people think, but you have the POTENTIAL to change that.

I started talking about this in a relationship context, how does this relate? Simple. There are people influencing one another and that can be a make or break in a relationship. Other people can influence a relationship (for either legitimate or illegitimate reasons of course). Prove to those idiots who think less of you. They don't know the real you, so prove to them what you're worth.

Your past will always be there. For the future, what you do with it and how you influence others with your past
is what matters.

JD

My Letter To You

It only took a bit of time to learn and realise many things with the time by myself. It has been proven time after time again that I'm able to cope on my own, but it isn't truly what I desired in my heart. As I've told you time after time again, the thing I truly want is security. To be able to fall back onto something, much like a soft cloud if I were to free fall from the sky. However, the definition of security for me has not ever been defined properly. I've said money is important so one is financially secure and hopefully free from debt. You agreed with me on that point, but your definition of security went much further. You incorporated people into your definition, something I was not able to do properly... Until now.

It only took one hard day at work to realise this with the people I cared about not being able to help me up. A law clerk's work burden is less than a lawyer's work load, but it was just one day to realise some of my advantages of working outside my limits. The advantages that you told me to seek and take advantage of were taken full advantage of and the results showed. Through the satisfaction of being able to finish everything that needed to be done and the compliments and appreciation of those around me at work, I would still go home alone. I would drive alone in my car, eat by myself and sleep by myself. There wouldn't be anyone to talk to other than the person serving me at dinner, but you know how well I get along with FOBs.

My advantage made me realise the true definition of security. As you know, I have the ability to go the extra distance in times of need. That what it was that day with one clerk needing to drive one of the lawyer's around and the other leaving early for golf (At least that's one less to worry about in the grand scheme of things). I had learn a lot during the 2 and a half weeks, but I was still an amateur in the firm. I knew things well at this time, but sometimes the quantity of work can be stressful, especially when the challenge of each task suddenly increases. That's when I needed to push my limits. Somehow it happened without me thinking about it. You've seen it happen in the presentation, you've seen it on the indoor soccer courts, now it had to happen again. It did. The end result was satisfying, but empty.

Why? I had only myself to confide in. I was happy with myself, but it was a shallow happiness. I knew I properly had to do something like that the next day and I really only spoke to my work colleagues face to face during the weekdays. They were not there for me after working hours though. That was when I realised that I didn't have that much security after all. Me being pushed beyond my limits puts me out of my comfort zone. I'm placed in a situation of insecurity, where things can go horribly wrong for everyone around me. This is especially even higher when you have others around you that you don't know that well. Don't get me wrong, most of the people there are supportive and helpful, but it can only take a few to ruin everything. That was insecurity at work. Insecurity at home was simply not having anyone there. It would be nice even to phone you, but as you know I'm trying to refrain myself from doing so for the sake of you.

At this point, I realised how much I've missed you. Not being able to talk with you properly has made me feel emptier. It is like my bucket capacity suddenly shrank. The feeling of safeness that I've felt with you and always have was that security I was seeking. As that fortune cookie said when you were with me after one of our exams: "All the answers you need are right there in front of you!"

I had realised my advantages and what I can do to use them. As you have told me, strengthening my strengths is what I should do. I now know that it will be key to reach my objectives in the future. However, to come home to something stable and secure is what I need at the end of the day. I cannot consistently be pushed to go beyond my limits. Maybe that is what security really is for me, to be able to just stay in my comfort zone. Of course, I need to go outside of it when the time arises, but at the end of the day, security is the feeling I seek. Maybe that is the key to happiness that I have been looking for the whole time...

Your allies, acquaintances, and your enemies... Who is who?

"As I walked into my year 4 class in primary school, I pretty much knew noone. The friends I knew from my year 2/3 were in a different class. I knew noone. I didn't know who my friends or enemies would be. Turned out the 3 people in the far right of the room would be them in due time. At least there were some friends I made.

As I walked into my year 5 class in primary school, I knew very little people, almost like last year. 2 more enemies, nothing too big in the friends category.

As I walked into my year 6 class in primary school, I knew one person from the entirety of my primary school life. My limits were tested that year, since the class was my enemy... That includes the teachers."

So yeah, primary school sucked for me...

The thing that is scary about being put into a new environment is that you just don't know what role people are going to play in your life. As I've previously stated, every one of our lives is a story, we have friends and foes, we have ups and downs, and everything that makes it interesting. The difference however is the transparency of people. Take Harry Potter for example, in the first movie you could tell right off the bat that Ron and Harmony were going to be Harry's friends, whilst Malfoy and Snape were going to be enemies with Harry. Unfortunately, it is not usually as clear cut as a movie may make it out to be.

This is simply due to people being complicated. One minute they like you, the next they give you a death scare (all the FOBs at uni, I'm talking about you in particular). The truth is that not everyone is going to like you, so you need to work out how to essentially "rank" people.

So how to do this? Is there a fool-proof formula to determine your friends and foes?

Simple answer is no. However, we can define the three categories as in the heading: Allies (friends), acquaintances and enemies. These categories are not that simple however, since they can even some into sub categories. Let me give you mine for example:

• Allies: People who you can get along with and will help you in times of need. This even involves selflessness on their part when it comes to assisting you. Of course as a good friend you should do the same. There are two categories to allies however:
• Emergency contact allies (best friends): These are the people really close to you and will help you, even if it means putting themselves second at times. Finding a friend like this means that you've found someone who you can really depend on. They give their all to help, and you do the same in return when it counts. These are the type of people that would save you from a burning house (without taking into account their physical capabilities). Note that there should not be many of these type of allies. If you have a lot falling under this category, you should really rethink your ranking system. 
• Fun allies: These are people who are similar to emergency contact allies, but they most likely would not put themselves first in dire situations, such as a burning house. They may or may not give their all to you. You should still keep them close, because they are your friends. They care about you, and you should do the same in return. These are people who will ride with you in a limo, and a bus.
• Acquaintances: Not quite friends for whatever reasons. Maybe you don't trust them to the extent as with a friend. That can be for various reasons. You would need to question how much they care about you as well. These aren't bad people by any means, but they should be kept an eye on. These are people who will ride with you in a limo, but not in a bus.
• Enemies:
• Irrational enemies: I'm going to be honest. I hate this category the worst. This is because they jump the gun and automatically hate you for some reason. Usually it's a stupid reasons, hence being an irrational enemy (shout out to all the FOBs reading this).
• Rational enemies: Enemies that have a rational reason to hate you. Whatever the reason is, these are the ones to really keep an eye upon.

So here are my categories defined. As much as I hated ranking people, the truth is that it needs to be done. Some people deserve more attention from you than others. If you spend time on people that doesn't give squat about you, it'll just zap your energy, and you won't have any left to use on people worthwhile.

So how to determine who falls under which category? There is no fool-proof way as I stated, but this guide may help:

Friend?

Firstly, write down on a piece of paper in two to three sentences what you define as a friend (not a best friend, just a friend in general). Don't think about it, just pick up a pen and write immediately. Now think of a person. Do they fit under what you want in a friend? If so, then good. If not, then they are probably an...

Acquaintance?

An acquaintance is someone you either just met and you know squat about them, or they were a friend, but crossed the line too many times. What do I mean by cross the line? Some people don't learn from their previous mistakes and they tend to repeat the same mistakes over and over again, resulting in you getting hurt. These people simply cannot be your friends. How much is too much? I go by the strike three rule: Three big foul ups, you're out. Of course, they can redeem themselves which may result in them taking out one strike point, but it has to be damn convincing. 

The way I like to think about it is like this: If I had all the money in the world, how much would this person hang out with you? Compare that to if you were on minimum wage, how much would this person hang out with you? If there is a significant difference, then they're an acquaintance. Friends do not have an incentive to hang out with a particular person based on a materialistic reason, such as money, fame or status. 

Enemies?

Not much to say. If someone hates your guts, then so be it. Not worth spending much energy on these people. Instead of riding with you in a bus, they'd play the role of the driver, which they bail out of the last second before they crash it.

A few points to consider when categorising someone:

• Don't let your first judgment be your last. In fact, your first judgment should NEVER be your last. You'll probably know more about this person in due time and you might like them. They could play a major role in your story as a good guy. In short, don't judge a book by it's cover.
• First impressions are important however, and can be a guide as to who is good and bad in general. But people can put on a face (shout out to the FOBs once again).
• Use your gut/heart to determine this. The brain can play a role once you get to know someone, but can block out people necessarily. Only use it if your heart/gut is at a 50-50.
• Be open minded. You're better off testing the waters with more people rather than restricting your chances of finding amazing people.
• Most important: People can switch from one category to another. This happens often, especially since people change over time. You can't help it about 99% of the time, so don't feel bad if it is for the worst.

One more thing: None of these categories are perfect. This includes the friends on your emergency contact list. You will have bumpy roads with them and there will be conflicts once in a while. You should take this as something that may be potentially good. This is because your friendship can get stronger when you get through it together. I guess in the words of Twilight Sparkle: "Friendship isn't easy, but there's no doubt that it is worth fighting for."

Why Rocky is named Rocky

There is a catch to this post. I'll tell you at the end (read through this first, don't just skip to the end. Trust me on this one).

Life has a lot of ups and downs as we know it. There is no such thing as a "free lunch" or a perfect ride. This rule generally applies to everyone in their daily lives. You train hard and you work hard to make the best possible outcome that you can for your future.

Of course, there are many people who fall off along the way. Look at the final year of high school for example. Many people seem to fall on the home run stretch, right near the heat of the final exams. University/college is also an example. Some fall on the first hurdle, the third, sixth, you get the point.

So why do people fall? If we have to work through and do the hard miles to get to somewhere, why do people still foul up, even though they know that the payoff will be worth it if they just stuck to what they do?

It's simple actually. People simply want to get there too fast.

We all have that dream to be somebody in the future. We have a motive in our hearts to aim for something in the long-term. Whether it would have to be to raise a family, status or money, it's still a motive nonetheless. Think back to your childhood self. You most likely wanted to pursue a particular career of some sort. This is your dream. However, this takes time to get there. You have to be bad first before you are good. That's why we have to go through kindergarden, school or some further education to achieve a particular goal. It may have to be some special training that you need to go through to achieve your dreams. We can't write a book if we don't know our ABCs, and we can't do algebra if we can't count from 1 to 10, that's how I like to see it.

As I've said, the journey isn't easy. Throughout your lifeline, you would have fallen many times when trying to make ends meet. It really does not come easy, especially since it can happen when we least expect it. As much as I hate to say this, but that's life. However, this may not be such a bad thing. There is nothing that punches harder than life itself. But it is isn't about how hard life beats you to the ground. It's about how hard you get hit, then picking yourself back up again.

Now do you see the difference between a winner and a coward? Cowards place themselves on a lower standard when they don't need to, simply because they've been beat down to the ground and they stay there beaten on the ground. Winners get beaten to the ground, but they get back up and raise themselves to the next challenge, improving themselves throughout their lives. Cowards look for excuses and point the finger looking to blame someone else for their misfortunes. As a result, they don't improve and they don't get anywhere in life. Winners look to improve themselves. They are humble in defeat, but they are always looking to better themselves in anyway possible. They take responsibility. That's how winners are made. You have to be willing to take the hits.

There you have it. To win in life, you need to be your own rock. A rock that grows harder and harder with each challenge you face. If you don't become your own rock, you won't have a life, since things will keep beating you down from living it properly.

So what's the catch with this post that I mentioned about at the beginning?

Firstly, if you've watched Rocky Balboa, you would see exactly what I mean. If you've watched Rocky 1-6 (yes, I'm calling it Rocky 6) you would always notice Rocky taking hits initially in every major fight. As he's shown, the way to win is to take the punches and rise up to that level. That is what I mean by becoming your own rock.

Secondly, my last few paragraphs are basically what Rocky said in this clip.

.

Come on Everypon- eh I mean everybody smile smile smile.

I'm not going to write anything today. Pinkie Pie explains everything I wanted to write today.

Your allies like it and your enemies hate it.

Don't mind the ponies.

JD

Your story is not the only story out there

I woke up this morning to see this video on my Facebook.

http://truthseekerdaily.com/2013/10/one-of-the-most-powerful-videos-you-will-ever-see/

The truth is, we don't know what will happen tomorrow. Each person is an author for their own lives but we cannot control everything around us. Each person writes their story with events occurring.

Now think about your story. If something were to happen to you tomorrow, your story would end. However, your story is not the only story that exists. There are people around you that also have a story to write themselves. This ranges from loved ones, to complete strangers, as we saw in that video.

This is one reason I never got why people committed suicide. Effectively, we are not only in our own story, but other's as well. If we end our own story, we still negatively effect the story of others around us. As you saw in that video, even complete strangers may play an important role to keep the story longer.

Of course, there are some that aim to be the villain in your own story.That's ok. Every story needs some good guys and bad guys. If everyone was a good guy, the story would be boring to read. Of course, if everyone was a bad guy it would probably be too depressing to read.

The point is if you are ever feeling down and that there are more bad guys than good in your story, there will still be some allies that are or will be alongside you somewhere in the future. The video itself showed that there are some with the goodwill to help out. The villains of your story is not a reason to end it, it should make the story go on so you can overcome their obstacles. That is what all heroes do after all. Since you're the main character of your story, you should take the role to be a hero.

JD

Maybe love isn't all about standards

"He's not an enderman, he's a frienderman!"

Short, black, green, creeper, enderman... Maybe it doesn't matter... Just... Maybe...

JD

"Refer to Signs"

Yesterday at uni I saw this. Even the parking meter is giving me some life advice.

It struck me. Signs are a catalyst in our lives to bring us to the next stage. How are they meant to be found? Well they aren't actually meant to be found. They are meant to come to you when the time and circumstances are right, just like the parking meter did after the time when we didn't have to pay for that period of time.

This is one of those things that we wait to come to us.

JD

The truth about yourself and the way you operate

As we grow up, we change the way we think. We start to think too much and feel too little.

Remember yourself as a child. We were carefree about the world and didn't have a mind to do a cost-benefit analysis on our decisions made. However, we have our parents/guardians to put boundaries on us so we don't do stupid things.

Now think about yourself as an adult. We are now able to make decisions on our own. We can think about the cost and benefits of our actions. Why? Because we are able to use the heart and head to figure out what we ought to do.

Ok, I'm not fully telling you the truth. I dunno how to use my heart...

This is awkward. How the hell does one possibility forget how to use the heart?

From my life experience, I had previously used my heart to make life decisions as people told you "follow your dreams", "follow your heart" and so on. However, this was my child like self that I was. I realised things were not going my way. Decisions I had made from my heart backlashed and things were simply not working out. I had concluded that my heart was just my own brick wall.

So what could I turn to? Oh my head of course! So screw the heart now cause I can use my adult like self to prevent bad decisions. I used my heart to analyse the circumstances around me so I was not as careless. I prevented bad outcomes from occurring, right?

Far from it.

The heart and head are not perfect. We are going to make mistakes one way or another. I was using my head to prevent bad things from happening which I had trained up over the past few years. But I wasn't happy. I still let bad things happened, so I was worse off as a result.

So what do I turn to then? My head and heart suck. What about mixing them together? Who should get a say when and how?

I tried to use my heart to make me happy. That didn't work. I tried to use my head to make me less unhappy. That didn't work. At this point, maybe we could be our own parents if we fused the efforts of our heads and hearts together, right?

This seems like a better solution. Use your heart to decide what you want to go for. Use your head to supervise cause your heart is careless. You're like a child in some ways. A child predominately uses their heart, but they still need their parents to at least supervise them from making careless decisions. As Walt Disney stated: "Adults are only kids grown up."

In short, use for heart to make good things happen. Use your head to prevent bad things.

I wished I knew this before things I said and had done, but it doesn't matter now. I'm at least using my past for the betterment of my future.

Now it is time to learn how to use that heart of mine. It is out of practice since it has been sleeping for the past few years or so.

Practice makes perfect I guess.

JD

The First Post, definitely not the last

The first blog, definitely not the last

8th October, 2013

This is a blog where I can freely speak my mind out to people about life experiences and things people can do to potentially make themselves a better person, whilst becoming a better person myself. Of course, i dunno how these blogs work, so for all I know I'm just talking to myself (well, I kinda am as I'm typing this).

Just so you know that you're not reading something from a complete stranger, here's a little bit about me. I'm a 22 year old male in South Australia currently studying at university. As in the blog's title, I am an Asian. More specifically, an ABC (Australian Born Chinese, not American Born Chinese).

Since the start of 2012, I have only started to really learn more about myself and the people around me. It isn't as easy as what they tell you in grade school. Of course, they warn you about certain obstacles such as career pathways, moving out of home and removing a condom from it's packaging. But the one thing that school doesn't teach us is the most important thing of all: People.

Why was there no warning of this? I'm surrounded by people!

I guess we can't blame school for keeping us in denial. I'm making people sound like our worst enemies. However, the truth is that they can be... But they can also be your greatest allies.

How so? People are different. There aren't two perfectly identical people. Some will accept you as a part of their life, some will want you to have no part of it, and some exists to be brick walls in your life.

What do we do with the brick walls then? This is where we can start to take control of things. We can choose what to do with those that try to get in the way of our objectives. I'll cover this on a later date since I'm jumping from one topic to another quite quickly.

JD